05/12/2020 - Stimming and Irrelevant Talk

I feel like an odd one out and I hate it. I feel like an odd one out because I think it is difficult for them to understand me ask me questions. I feel like an odd one out when I meet my friends because I’m saying all irrelevant things and I cannot stop saying them because I like to do solo talk because it makes me feel good and excited.

March 2021

I find it difficult to talk to my teachers and others because I feel shy and hide and I feel very excited so my relevant words are there in my head but when I say it out loud then wrong words come out of my mouth. I do not know why wrong words come out I find it funny. I find it funny but I know others do not like it so I feel foolish and frustrated. I find it difficult to throw away irrelevant thoughts. I find it funny but others feel angry and irritated and that makes me scared and worried because all are disappointed in me. I feel very disturbed that I don’t know how to think relevantly.

April 2021

I am feeling angry because I think Ms. Manda is going to another school and I am over here. I feel like no one will ever understand the truth about all about the characters in my head. I think that Ms. Manda helps me to throw them away and it makes me feel proud of myself. When Ms. Manda leaves I want my school teachers to help me to talk relevant and throw the characters away. I want them to ask questions to understand my feelings. I am troubled because the characters are going away and that is making me upset because all of them need to leave. I like them because they talk to me and give me company. I am feeling uncomfortable because there are too many things upsetting me in my brain.

May 2021

Irrelevant talk

People cannot understand.

I think irrelevant talk is right but people think it is wrong. My cousins, dada, my sister, and my teachers think it is wrong.

I think that irrelevant talk is right because it makes me feel happy. It makes me feel happy because it has all of the characters. And the characters make me feel excited and I like it. It is easy to talk to them, but I like to talk to mummy more.

Ms. Manda helps me to talk relevantly because she helps me with the words in my mind to make it a sentence.

I want to tell my teachers to give me all of the relevant words in my mind.

It is easier to have the characters because I can talk to them easily.

I want to tell my teachers that I need time, I need them to tell my characters to go away, tell me to turn the attention button on, give me options.

August 2021

Sometimes I see or imagine a movie in my head, it’s about all the characters from my favourite animated movies. I feel excited and happy to see the video in my head this makes me have funny thoughts and I start to jump and laugh. Then my relevant thoughts get canceled and I can’t pay attention to what someone is saying then I start speaking irrelevant words which are all from the movie in my head so it is relevant for me but everybody else gets angry and frustrated and they stop chatting with me. I didn’t know that everybody else doesn’t have a video in their head, that is why I used to get angry and confused when I used to speak irrelevant.

Mum speaks

Reh would stim and talk irrelevantly incessantly and we had tried to find innumerable ways to help him over the years and I had mentally accepted that this may never change. Until he wrote about feeling like the “odd one out” in December 2020. Reh shared that he was very motivated to be friendly and learn to chat relevantly with others. Thus began our journey with Ms. Manda to help him chat relevantly with others. The above are his journal entries and thoughts as we explored the reasons he spoke irrelevantly and one can see how they mature and evolve as he processed them over the next few months.

These journal entries gave us some very important insights about how he thought all people had movies in their heads and that he believed we all could see the movie in his head. We worked with our Autism Consultant Carol to break down each challenge through the process of conversing with him on the core issues and finding a unique way that he could understand. As each bit was understood and assimilated, we found he felt empowered to share more and that felt good for both him and us. Carol suggested we try ‘Solo Talk’ where we gave him regular breaks at times when we knew he was overstimulated or agitated to go into a private space to stim and talk to the characters in his head aloud. Manda started executing this in her sessions and it worked. This was a breakthrough. Understanding that irrelevant talk was needed but could be restricted to times when he was alone in a private space made all the difference. Solo Talk helps calm him down and he is now able to speak relevantly without stimming for longer periods especially in school.

We hope he will move further ahead in his interactions with others over the next few months because he wants very much to be with people!

To read more please go to Mum speaks on the site menu.